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Cast of Characters



E. Oliver Coakley


He’s the lost Computer Science major rampaging across the barren fields of the Rochester Institute of Technology looking for love, excitement, and adventure. Or just booze. Yes, this is me. Yes, this is my life. Yes, it’s all real.

Pasha Tchourilov


E. Oliver Coakley’s drunken partner in crime. Ex-Resident Hall advisor and Bio-Tech Major, Pasha aka “Pavel Pavel Turkeylove” participates in many a drunken adventure. Despite his friendly appearance and gung-ho nature, don’t be too quick to heed his word while drunk. It may or may not cause AIDS.

Stec


Ever had an opinion on anything music related? He’ll tell you you’re wrong, and then explain how wrong you are over a good twenty minute rant. E. Oliver’s friend since High School, and fellow CS major, the cynical Stec accompanies E. Oliver Coakley on most of his misadventures, acting as more of a commentator rather than a participant.

Jackson Coakley


The IT major and brother of E. Oliver Coakley. Whereas E. Oliver could get away with murder, Jackson could easily manage to get the gallows for littering. Intelligent, jovial and always ready for action. Shares a similar cynical viewpoint on life as E. Oliver. He transferred to RIT during E. Oliver’s 3rd year.

Mom and Dad


My loving, caring, and nurturing parents. Thank God they don’t read this. Well, my dad does and he loves it. My mother did, and now has the grief counselor on speed dial.

Mara


A little Asian girl with a severe case of ADD and anger-management issues. Fun to play with, not to eat.

Heidi


Ex-girlfriend, art major, cynic.

Wally


The good blue angel on the right shoulder. Once a proud angel of righteousness, he has been driven to alcoholism by E. Oliver’s antics and Ambrose’s influence. He now dispenses poor advice.

Ambrose


Born from a hallucination in Computer Science class, he now sits upon the left shoulder of E. Oliver Coakley. He plays the roll of the traditionally “evil” side of Emmett’s conscience. He tends to enjoy tormenting his master more than dispensing self-destructive advice. That’s Wally’s job.